Ron Shortsweather here, kiddles... and I want to tell you that I'm gettin in the RESURRECTION game! That's right, if you want to get ahead of the peking order, what yer going to want to do is sign up on the dotted line for THE RON SHORTSWEATHER ALL-TIME QUARTERBACK CHURCH OF THE ABJECTION!
We offer quality redemption at conventional prices! Other religious will candy-coat your eternity with "promises" like an audience with your redeemer and maybe an angel harp or wing. AT OUR CHURCH, WE SAY NO TO THAT AND YES TO THIS.
It's a four step pocress:
1) Show up.
2) Put your faith in me and your hand in mine!
3... Consecrate really really really really hard on everything you've ever wanted
$) YOU WILL WAKE UP IN THE MORNING FEELING GLORIOUSLY ALIVE AND ON FIRE... WITH THE SPIRIT OF OPPORTUNITY!!!!!!!!!
Together, we CAN bake a difference! DOnT FORGET THE OFFETORY HYMN, MOTHER TERESA!
Pieces (of me) be with you,
Fr. Ron Shortsweather, Msgr.
Inaugural Speaker of the Word of Truth
"Thanks be to ME!"
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